Sunday, September 4, 2016

Dear Publisher,

I have received you recent rejection notice.  It is extremely well-written and imaginative, but I'm afraid it's just not what I'm looking for right now.  Consequently, I'm going to have to publish my short story in your magazine/anthology/website/newsletter/loose sheaf of crumpled notebook paper anyway.

Please bear in mind that even an excellent rejection letter will not meet the tastes of every writer.  As I'm sure you're aware, I receive MANY rejection letters, and can only accept a small percentage. I am confident that you will find a home for your work very soon with another reputable author.

Best wishes going forward, and I hope you will bear me in mind for future rejections.

-Steve DuBois